(Note: for the blog in question, click here!)

The Malaysian Government cannot, cannot, appreciate a good joke.  The Malaysian Government does not, does not, understand the concept of a satire.

The Prime Minister should really stop this sham of a trial.  Hassan Skodeng (that’s not even his real name!) is the man behind the blog that gave us that prank article about Tenaga Nasional suing the WWF over Earth Hour.  We’ll never get to read that post again, as it’s been pulled off indefinitely.

Now, this attention has undoubtedly given a boost in Nose4news’ readership, but in all honesty, a man with a wicked sense of humour is being tried because of a joke.

That’s it.

You tell a joke online, and get sentenced because of it.

What gives?  It’s really just a local Onion wannabe, for fuck’s sake.

Someone up there should lighten up.

For more about the case, take a look at Rocky Bru’s article and a reactionary piece from a DAP representative courtesy of the Malaysian Insider.

Hi @iantai,

Over the coming weeks, we will be making two important updates that will impact how you interact with Twitter applications. We are sending this notice to all Twitter users to make sure you are aware of these changes.

What are applications?

There are over 250,000 applications built using the Twitter API. To use most applications, you first authorize the application to access your Twitter account, after which you can use it to read and post Tweets, discover new users and more. Applications come in many varieties, including desktop applications like TweetDeck, Seesmic, or EchoFon, websites such as TweetMeme, fflick, or Topsy, or mobile applications such as Twitter for iPhone, Twitter for Blackberry, or Foursquare.

Update 1: New authorization rules for applications

Starting August 31, all applications will be required to use “OAuth” to access your Twitter account.

What’s OAuth?

• OAuth is a technology that enables applications to access Twitter on your behalf with your approval without asking you directly for your password.
• Desktop and mobile applications may still ask for your password once, but after that request, they are required to use OAuth in order to access your timeline or allow you to tweet.

What does this mean for me?

• Applications are no longer allowed to store your password.
• If you change your password, the applications will continue to work.
• Some applications you have been using may require you to reauthorize them or may stop functioning at the time of this change.
• All applications you have authorized will be listed at http://twitter.com/settings/connections.
• You can revoke access to any application at any time from the list.

Update 2: t.co URL wrapping

In the coming weeks, we will be expanding the roll-out of our link wrapping service t.co, which wraps links in Tweets with a new, simplified link. Wrapped links are displayed in a way that is easier to read, with the actual domain and part of the URL showing, so that you know what you are clicking on. When you click on a wrapped link, your request will pass through the Twitter service to check if the destination site is known to contain malware, and we then will forward you on to the destination URL. All of that should happen in an instant.

You will start seeing these links on certain accounts that have opted-in to the service; we expect to roll this out to all users by the end of the year. When this happens, all links shared on Twitter.com or third-party apps will be wrapped with a t.co URL.

What does this mean for me?

• A really long link such as http://www.amazon.com/Delivering-Happiness-Profits-Passion-Purpose/dp/0446563048 might be wrapped as http://t.co/DRo0trj for display on SMS, but it could be displayed to web or application users as amazon.com/Delivering- or as the whole URL or page title.
• You will start seeing links in a way that removes the obscurity of shortened links and lets you know where each link will take you.
• When you click on these links from Twitter.com or a Twitter application, Twitter will log that click. We hope to use this data to provide better and more relevant content to you over time.

Thanks for reading this important update. Come and check what’s new at http://twitter.com.

Thanks,
The Twitter Team

If you’re reading this blog/dossier/confessional/whinefarm for the first time, it’s most likely because you’re sober enough to remember my final whore-out to you at the end of my mini-set.  And for that,  I’d like to thank you…once I finish scratching my crotch.

Thank you!

I’d say that tonight’s set was better because of a warmer crowd, even though my small army of friends had to sit away from the action.  But it was fun, and it’s sort of given me the confidence to whore myself even more!

Who can resist a song about titties?

I’ve got a good feeling running through me right now.  But I’d also like to give a shoutout to Jonathan Ng; if you get the chance to read this, I hope that you do feel better — some people take things the wrong way sometimes.  I think the trick really is in the execution.

My next step is to try to play at The Bee next Wednesday (the 8th!).  Wish me luck.  I hope they give me a shot — I really do dig their burgers, and I’ll promise to gobble one down if I get a crack at the gig.

And if you’re not reading this silly little site for the first time, jom!  This whole gigging thing is fun (as long as someone claps).

Oh, and thank you!

Ahh.  All done.

I might be fat, but I need love chubby lovin’, too.

It’d be great to get laid right now.

I think holidays usually give my body a recharge of mojo that I don’t really have time to pay attention to while I’m at work.

Is it a bad thing that I’m about to try to sate my horniness with Lego?

No, it’s not!

To commemorate Malaysia’s Independence Day, I bought an X-Wing Lego set.

Okay, the purpose of purchasing it might be a bit off, but it’s been completed!  According to Matthew, the set is relatively old, and it’s RM 260 price tag was worth it, seeing how it’s original price was a lot steeper back in the day.  I’m quite pleased with myself, especially when you consider that it also includes 5 mini-figurines.  On top of that, I also grabbed a classic Darth Vader and Stormtrooper key chain, along with a Force Unleashed-edition Vader.  Wootage!

(Click on the thumbnails for the bigger Forcetastic goodness!)

You know the drill!  This time, I’m dragging Stanley Morris along to share the set with me.

It’s at Laila’s Cafe & Lounge, Kelana Jaya.  Come before 10 p.m. so that you don’t have to pay the RM 10 cover charge!

As a ground rule, it’s always a nice gesture to actually buy a drink at Starbucks before sitting down to use the Wi-Fi.  Or at the very least, just get up off your seat after setting up to buy a drink.

Fricking kids.  If you’re wealthy enough to own a nifty netbook, I’m quite sure you could spare 5 quid to buy yourself a black Americano.

Sigh.  Everybody wants to outdo each other in terms of Chinkyness.

I’m not too keen on making plans, especially when it’s on a holiday — you could probably try to construct the itinerary for an action-packed day, but you’d most likely be sleeping in for half the day before anything were to start.  That’s actually quite sad, because there’s no doubt that it’s bound to be an incredibly hot and sunny day (at least in Kuala Lumpur), and there really is a lot to do.

It’s moments like these that make me wish I was living in Kota Kinabalu — the beach isn’t that far away.  It probably won’t give anyone that quirky cosmopolitan feel that somewhere such as Melbourne might give, but it’s got it where it counts.  I could always try my luck in Singapore, but I doubt that they’d like me much…and I doubt that I’d like them much, either.

I always complain about how my weekdays feel incredibly routine, but they have to be — I suppose it’s better to be a creature of routine when it comes to work.  Our problem would probably stem from finding things to do during the weekend; life revolves around eating and shopping.

Bah.

I’ve just come across this in The Star Online!

I can’t wait til we can see the following headline being sprouted one day:

M’sia running out of patience with street demos in Malaysia.

Admit it, that’d make an equally compelling story.

I think every self-respecting Malaysian muso-wannabe has wanted to have written for Junk.  I wouldn’t call Junk Malaysia’s answer to Rolling Stone — it’s more of a hotwash of a junior version of Spin and every urban lifestyle magazine you can think of.  Either way, Junk recently wrapped up its physical publication history with a last issue, and will now be totally web-based.

I applied for a position with Junk almost a year ago, and took another look at the cover letter that I’d written them, which I think was quite brilliant — to an extent.  However, you’ll probably note that this is a good example of what not to write in a cover letter, unless the position calls for it.  By the way, I didn’t get the job.  I was actually quite gutted about that.

* * * * *

Wednesday, 21^st October, 2009

Ian Tai

M: 016-3957689
E: ian.tai@live.com /  ian@iantai.net

W: iantai.net / facebook.com/iantai / twitter.com/iantai

To the Powers-That-Be At Junk Magazine!

It’s been a long time since I wrote one of these, so please excuse my giddiness!  A bird on the grapevine told me that you were looking for a new writer (I thanked the bird and then subsequently ate it).

I hope that I somewhat fit the bill.  After all, I can write, and I like money, so why can’t I write for money?  But don’t just take my word for it!  (Though if you did, this would be much easier.)

I’ve attached some pieces that I’d done during my stint as Subeditor in Chief of Lust Magazine, and you can also read what I have to say and find out more about me at http://iantai.net (which might seem like a bit of a morose read, but on the bright side, you can also listen to my own songs, ready-made for AOR!).

I have experience in being an Account Executive in advertising, as well as in event management and co-ordination, which, by right, should make me a well-rounded, organized individual.  But I’d like to take up a new challenge that isn’t related to client servicing; after all, a job that involves writing and music would make me more contented, rather than a job that involves me trying to make everybody else more contented.

Favourite acts: U2, Coldplay, Oasis, Travis, The Beatles, The Stones, Jamiroquai, Bon Jovi (I’m sorry, but it’s true), Stereophonics, Third Eye Blind, RHCP and Aerosmith.  And me.

My pet peeves: bittergourds and baldness.

My bad bits: I pick my nose very often; I sometimes talk in a funny accent that makes me look pretentious (I swear, it’s not put on!); I play Abbey Road once a day just to annoy people; I can’t get into the office any earlier than 9:30 a.m. on a day of good traffic; I’m quite fat.

My good bits: I love music; I’m anal when it comes to grammar and punctuation; I like to contribute to a group dynamic to make it more…dynamic; like Donna Summer, I work hard for the money; I like to catch up on my daily events and pop culture oddities; I’m quite willing to make an ass out of myself for the Greater Good.

I’m quite sure that there’re a lot of others who’re lapping this opportunity up.  What sets me apart is my sizeable girth and receding hairline.

Anyway, I’d just like to thank you for your time for reading this!

Yours sincerely,
Ian Tai

^{(Please hire me and make Mrs. Tai proud of her son.  All she’s ever wanted to do was to see me write.)}

* * * * *

Oh, well.  Memories!